So I had been experiencing a bit of a confidence crisis for a while now. I won’t even say for how long because I find myself embarrassed at how long it took me to get in touch with my true creative nature and honor myself.
I bring this up because I want to encourage anyone who is going through or has gone through a similar experience. It can be quite painful, shaming and disconcerting if you don’t really know how to get your bearings.
It really all starts with our thoughts about our abilities and if you are feeling overwhelmed or blocked creatively it’s easy to start being hard on yourself.
I was beating myself up for my inability to focus (i.e. “squirrel brain”), my penchant for racing thoughts (i.e. “monkey brain”) and just the overall inability to get my shit together in life and in business.
I was recently watching the documentary “Awake in the Dream” where “monkey brain” was discussed. There was all of this footage with monkeys running around and I had this thought-“To a monkey, ‘monkey brain’ is a natural state of being. He doesn’t beat himself up about it.”
Now granted we are human so maybe “monkey brain” isn’t our natural state of being and that’s why it feels so uncomfortable to us but my point is it’s what we TELL ourselves about how we SHOULD be that really causes all of our sufferings.
Now I must say that during this “confidence crisis” if you will, there were all of these supposedly well-meaning individuals coming out of the woodwork trying to give me “friendly” advice about what I “should” be doing to fix myself.
Some of them even suggested I go to therapy or anger management when I didn’t choose their solution for me. Luckily, I waded through the bullshit and realized that they were only honoring the vibration I was putting out to the universe that somehow I felt there was something “wrong” with me which put me in a “less than” position.
If you find yourself in a similar situation or vibrational space, be aware that you will attract anyone attached to their ego who, however well-meaning, will try to fix you. I have one word of advice-RUN! Very far away and quickly.
This is the time to honor yourself as you are easily vulnerable to the egos of others. But this is not what you NEED. What you need is to come back to yourself and, if need be, seclude yourself from the outside world and its influences until you get grounded enough to hear your own voice. The voice of the true self which has been there all along.
Everything else is just noise.
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